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Issue 2

Siamese Twin More Religious Than Her Sister

BROOKLYN, NY — [TheKnish.com] Shifra and Golda Weinblatt are not your ordinary twins. They're Siamese. And not just ordinary Siamese, they have one body, and two heads. Besides for the host of problems that ensue that we can all possibly imagine, Shifra and Golda have a huge problem.

Shifra is frummer than Golda. Way frummer, and Golda's beginning to be annoyed. Shifra wants her elbows covered, and Golda feels smothered by it, especially in the summer. Shifra wants her knees covered, but Golda likes the locomotion possible with skirt slits. Shifra is worried about what the neighbors think when Golda is dressed immodestly. Shifra replies that they never go out in public anyway, so what's the big deal? Shifra replies that in the event that they do, she'll be embarrassed.

The problems go on and on and on, with no possible compromise in sight. A calm may come over the twins though, they've recently been dating a similar double-headed Siamese fellow from Great Neck. Strangely enough, one fellow is frummer than the other, STILL stranger is that Shifra is attracted to the less from brother, while Golda is attracted to the more frum brother, so perhaps some sort of compromise may be in the works.

As for Golda deciding if and how she'll cover her hair or not if the twins marry, it looks like it's gonna be a cat fight, a Siamese Cat fight.

Writer


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