David Bar-Magen

David Bar-Magen often forgets why he entered the room, and this one time he ran over a squirrel. Seriously, the damn thing just ran in front of the car like it wanted to end it all. David has spent some quality time of his life in the Ir Hakadosh, Lakewood, NJ. He attributes this exposure to the generally unhinged state of his mind and the fact that he sometimes bolts upright at three in the morning in a cold sweat, yelling, "Hide the TV! Wake the children!" When not concentrating on maintaining enough sanity to write knish-flavored articles (it doesn't take much), David enjoys mimicking passersby and recounting gruesomely humiliating dating stories that never happened to him. David is very happy that Five Hour Energy has recently obtained the Star-K symbol.

Email: davidbarmagen@gmail.com

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Did You Know?

Tzitzis can be used as a handy flotation device in case of emergencies. Just wave it in the air until someone throws you a lifesaver.

Knish Horoscope

Dagim/Pisces: You will find both the source of that smell and that gefilte fish that went missing.

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Bush II Do you like satire? Do you like the Bible? Do you like politics? Do you like them all together at the same time? Now, for the first time ever, you can kill all three birds with one stone. Bush II, Book I is the King James Version of the first term of George W. Bush. Buy it and multitask like never before.