Issue 23

Baked September 1, 2005

Hot Stories

Brooklyn Couple First to Admit Meeting on Dating Website

Raizy and Sruli Klinger have accomplished what many insiders consider to be a culture changing event. Last Thursday they called together a yenta conference and officially announced that they had met on Frumster.com. […] Full Story

GazaDisney Management is Upbeat Despite Signs of a Slow Start

One month after its opening, the Gaza Disneyland theme park - just a stone's throw from Gaza City - is not proving to be the cultural invasion that management thought it would be. […] Full Story

Bush Proposes Moving Nation's Capital to Williamsburg

Business leaders say Williamsburg, the city which currently gives President George W. Bush his highest approval rating in the nation (12.2%), could soon be getting something in return, as the president today proposed moving the nation’s capital to Williamsburg for the remainder of his second term. […] Full Story

Runaway Kallah Turns Up With a Veil Over Her Head

Moish “Steeny” Steenowitz was in for a surprise as he stepped up to his chupah earlier this evening, escorted by his parents and the videographer. […] Full Story

E-Harmony Adds "Yichus" to Dimensions of Compatibility

Finally bowing to pressure from shadchonim everywhere, eHarmony.com has decided to add "yichus" to its dimensions of compatibility, bringing the total list of dimensions to 30. […] Full Story

Chasidim Refuse to Set Timetable for Lakewood Withdrawal

The sect of chasidim that have infiltrated Lakewood said today that they understand and respects the views of those who are calling for them to cut short their incursion, but warned that an immediate withdrawal would send a terrible signal to the litvaks. […] Full Story

Cool Photos

  • captioned pic Reconstructionist Judaism Takes on Entirely New Meaning
  • captioned pic Aish HaTorah Lands Biggest BT Ever
  • captioned pic Cholent Tasting Festival Passes Eventfully

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Did You Know?

Tzitzis can be used as a handy flotation device in case of emergencies. Just wave it in the air until someone throws you a lifesaver.

On This Day

On February 24, 1923, Chaim Marshowitz won the first gefilte fish eating contest.

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Bush II Do you like satire? Do you like the Bible? Do you like politics? Do you like them all together at the same time? Now, for the first time ever, you can kill all three birds with one stone. Bush II, Book I is the King James Version of the first term of George W. Bush. Buy it and multitask like never before.