June 1, 2005 | Issue 21

Yoda is Elected New Bobover Rebbe

article pic BORO PARK, BROOKLYN — [TheKnish.com] Reb Yoda Hakooten has been elected as the Bobover Rebbe, the head of Boro Park's 50,000 Bobover Chasidim. Taking the name Rav Halberstam III, the 900-year-old Master Jedi appeared on the balcony of St. Bobov's Promenade.

His arrival was greeted by loud cheers from the many thousands of chasidim who had packed St. Bobov's Promenade as news of his election spread across Boro Park.

He was chosen on the third round of votes by the 115 Rebbeim meeting to select Rav Halberstam II's successor. Traditionally, black besomim rising from the Promenade's chimney denotes an unsuccessful vote. This occurred once earlier in the week. This time, white besomim rose and the jubilation began with Bobover chasidim raising their green lulav-holders in the air in honor of Rav Halberstam III's lightsaber.

The name Halberstam comes from the German for "half one for no reason."

Giving a short address in Yinglish to the crowds gathered below the new Rav paid homage to his predecessor, and great friend, Rav Halberstam II.

"Tayirah breeder mit nekaives, Elected me, the Rebbeim have, ahn ahrbaiter, simple and humble in the L-rd's vineyard, am I," he said.

"Consoled I am, the fact that the L-rd can work and act even with insufficient means, entrust myself to your tefilos, I do."

Clad in a cute little beketcher originally designed for a Chasid Patch Doll and a shtreimel with holes for his ears, he then delivered the traditional "Urbi et Orbi" (to the City and the World) blessing to the city of Boro Park and the world.

Promenade spokesman Shmeel Rosenbaum said Rav Halberstam III would farbreng with Bobover Rebbeim later on Tuesday and celebrate a kiddish with them in the Bobover Sukkah on Wednesday morning at 0900 (0700 GMT), give or take five hours.

He will be inaugurated as the third Rav on Sunday, the Promenade has announced.

The new Rav had been one of the front runners in the Ravinical election which began on Monday when the 115 voting Rebbeim were sequestered in the Beis Medrish for their secret conclave.

Rav Halberstam III, who is the oldest Rav ever elected to the position, was born long long ago, in a galaxy far, far away into a traditional farming family, although his father was a pilot in the Rebel Alliance.

The future Rav's studies at seminary were interrupted by The Clone Wars and his supporters say that his experiences under the Dark Side's regime convinced him that Bobov had to stand up for truth and freedom.

The Bobov Broadcasting Channel's (BBC) Itzik Kornfefer in Boro Park says his ravacy is sure to continue Halberstam II's strongly traditional interpretation of the Jewish faith, including opposition to the deaf, idiots, minors, slaves, gentiles and women.

Our correspondent says that the homily he made at the kiddish before the start of the Conclave, in which he denounced all deviations from traditional Jewish teachings as trickery and error, may have been decisive in winning him the title of Rav.

Also theoretically instrumental in the decision was Halberstam III's species, which is believed to be immortal. Misadventure would be the only concern for the Bobovers, instead of annoying human lifespans that keep getting in the way. A good responsible shammos could have the Rav hale for a long, long time. Bobov is now accepting applications for the padawan position.


Pencil Martin Bodek is short, dark, handsome, runs marathons (finishes them too!), can solve a Rubik's Cube in 1:47, is a big TED chasid, can whup your keister in Scrabble, loves halva, co-founded TheKnish.com, and writes books from 5-9: http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/mbodekatgmaildotcom


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