February 1, 2005 | Issue 18

PETA Exposes New Undercover Video

BORO PARK, BROOKLYN — [TheKnish.com] In the wake of the recent controversy over a kosher slaughterhouse in Iowa, PETA released a new undercover video yesterday that show even more gruesome goings-on in the kosher community. This time, the culprit was closer to home, namely Yitzhak’s Pizza on 13th Avenue in Boro Park. The video was taken of tiny bugs called copepods being ensnared by horrible filters.

A few months ago, Yitzhak installed the filter in his soda machine when the bugs were found in New York’s water supply. This prevented his clientele from being instantly hit by lightning while drinking Fresca. Last week, a PETA operative, undercover as a falafel maker, managed to thread a microscopic video camera into the filter to take the footage.

The gruesome footage, which is posted on the PETA web site, shows thousands of copepods struggling to break free of the filter. The web site explains that after struggling for a week, the filter is cleaned out and the copepods end up being washed down the drain. However, they do concede that as they have not checked all filters in all kosher pizza stores, their claim is only against Yitzhak’s Pizza and not the general frum pizza industry.

A PETA representative went to Yitzhak’s Pizza to demand that Yitzhak either remove his filter or close shop. Yitzhak got confused and served the female representative 2 slices and a large Coke. In protest of the filtered carbonated beverage, the representative stripped naked and poured the soda all over herself. Unfortunately, there was a table full of bochrim at the pizza store at the time. TheKnish.com has learned that these bochrim have been sent to a yeshiva “out of town” for rehabilitation.

Writer

Pencil David Friedman tries to be gentle to the little buggies when he filters his water.


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Don't yell Challah Don't Yell Challah in a Crowded Matzah Bakery!: The Book of Kosher L'Pesach Humor & Stress Relief by Mordechai Schmutter will ease those frazzled nerves before, during, and after the hectic Pesach season. Buy two copies so you can keep one Pesachdik.