Mrs. Adler's Hechsher Removed Due to Immodest Dress on Label

LAKEWOOD, NEW JERSEY — [TheKnish.com] In keeping with recent tightening of Kashrus standards, The Unorthodox Union has decided to remove their endorsement of Mrs. Adler's products due to her immodest clothing.

In a press release, The Unorthodox Union states that "Mrs. Adler, although a very nice lady, has her hair uncovered, which is unacceptable in Orthodox circles. Also, she has a dangerous plunging neckline, which can be very distracting at the Shabbos table and could lead to levity of mind and conversations between men and women, heaven forbid."

The statement goes on to say that "Even Aunt Jemima has her hair respectfully covered. Also, Mrs. Butterworth wears a very respectful long skirt. They should be commended and Mrs. Adler should emulate their style before we consider re-granting our Hechsher."

Mrs. Adler could not be reached for comment, as she was putting on a sheitel and donning a modest blouse so that she could take new pictures in an effort to be certified kosher again.

Writer

Martin Bodek is short, dark, handsome, runs marathons (finishes them too!), can solve a Rubik's Cube in 1:47, is a big TED chasid, can whup your keister in Scrabble, loves Halva, co-founded TheKnish.com and wrote a book!: Bush II, Book I, which you must buy, or else we'll take another year to release another issue!

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3 Comments

Barbara Godding said...

THIS IS AMERICA NOT ISRAEL!!!
LAVE HER ALONE YOU FANATICS!!!

October 31, 2008 at 5:13 p.m.

Mrs. Adler said...

Thanks for sticking up for me, Barbara! I'm so glad the crazy people are on my side, you're my core constituency. Don't forget to buy my products!

October 31, 2008 at 8:56 p.m.

Mr. Adler said...

Mrs. Adler has been cooking these products for over 50 years. Trust me when I tell you - that's not her hair. It's a sheitel(wig). And, since she is over 80 years old, that neckline would have to plunge a lot farther to even begin to cause the kind of concerns that you express. It would also help if she were 50 years younger. At our age that kind of conversation has not been heard at our table for over forty years.

March 14, 2009 at 6:14 p.m.

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