Far Rockaway Woman Undergoes Snoodectomy

FAR ROCKAWAY, NY — [TheKnish.com] A Far Rockaway woman is recovering today from a snoodectomy - a controversial new surgical technique developed by top Jewish doctors at Beth Israel Medical Center and Long Island Jewish Hospital. The snoodectomy procedure was developed to treat the malady known as snooditis, a dangerous condition in which the snood becomes attached to a woman’s head from long hours of use.

One out of every two thousand frum women suffer from this condition, according to the Center for Frummy Disease Control (CFDC), but until recently there was no way to treat it, except for saying a mishebarach in shul for the afflicted woman and coordinating all her clothing to match the permanent head covering.

As the first woman to undergo a snoodectomy, Mrs. Blima Blumenthal was proud to be the guinea pig and was also relieved once again to be able to wear her Indian-hair-free shaitel. “When I had my third child,” she said, “I decided to save time in the morning by leaving my snood on all night. By the time I had my fifth child, I realized that the snood was permanently stuck on my head.”

Dr. Chaim Zvi Gezundt was the leader of the surgical team that pioneered the new technique. After several grueling hours in the operating room Dr. Gezundt called his mother to give her some nachas and then held a press conference where he regaled reporters with intimate and gory details of the surgery. “It was just like a bris, only, ya know, a lot bigger.” Dr. Gezundt commented.

Writer

Ayala Cohen spends her days as a media research supervisor at a global media agency, and her nights and weekends as a knitting/crocheting teacher. Ayala is married to magician Binyamin Cohen. “Yes, I’m the magician’s wife. No, he never cuts me in half or makes me disappear, but you’re the first person to make that witty comment.” They have three children, Pru, R’vu, and Kein Yirbu.

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